Why All The Glum Faces?

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

So I’m listening to Bush on the radio at 10 a.m. as he makes his speech. I’ve already been tipped off that Rummy is gonna resign and so I’m just waiting.

And I hear his awkward entrance, “Why All the Glum Faces?” And no response. Not even the click of a camera. Ooof. It’s like when I perform at the Laugh Factory. Except it’s not like that. I can’t make some of the people at the LF laugh because they only know monosyllabic words whereas Bush was making his jokes again at a time that is not a laughing matter for his people.

Then he went into his usual routine about changing the drapes. I swear he does this joke all the freaking time. Whenever anyone moves on or moves in, he talks about the interior decorator coming in and changing the drapes. It’s almost like the way he thinks you can just go into Iraq and change the drapes and everyone will great us as liberators.

Anyway he talked to us like we were in third grade, listing carefully the people he was going to meet with and has met with. “I had a conversation with…I had a talk with….”

Now he was reminding me of a little kid who has a note from the principal saying, “George has behaved badly. He said that he’ll keep behaving badly even if the entire school board is up against him.” And he has to hand that note to his mother and he knows the jig is up.

I’m sitting there…”Where’s the Rummy news?”

Finally as if he’s just casually reading off a grocery list Bush is like, “Celery, lettuce, milk, eggs, Rumsfeld will resign, wait do we need eggs? I think we just got some last week and the expiration date is not for a while…………butter….

Of course he said Rumsfeld did a fabulous job and so did Brownie and that’s why they had to leave. They are just TOO good. They are so amazing, as amazing as Tom Cruise is to Katie that they just had to leave office and Tom is so amazing to Katie that’s why she keeps post-poning the wedding and looking forlorn and lonely holding her grande coffee.

But I’m the ultimate bleeding heart because I truly feel bad for Bush. He makes me really sad. He’s such a damaged person from a home that clearly didn’t give him something. And he seriously knows not what he does. Or he does know and he doesn’t care but that still qualifies to me as not knowing what he does. Those damaged Repubs are in my prayers but I’m glad they are not in my White House for long.

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